Pissed

I went out to the garage yesterday to get on Serena and ride the SART to the gym for my Monday morning workout and this is what I saw...another motherscratching flat tire!  FLARG!!!!

I figured instead of ordering more Avenir tubes and getting frequent flats, I'd head on down to The Path bike shop to support my local business.  Unfortunately for me, I walked into The Path during what is apparently 'Bong 30' or something like that because there were at least eight people working and all of them appeared to be completely baked out of their minds.  I took one look around, realized this wasn't the typical weekend crew of hardened bike folks so I decided to try and help myself.  Here's what I found when I got to the shelf where they keep their tubes:

Yes, a complete unholy mess of shit, none of which matched the size tube I had.  Anywho, I got some guy to help me out.  The guy who works at the shop told me they didn't have my size and gave me another one and said (say this like Spicoli in your mind) "Deed, tubes totally stretch mahhn.  You'll be fine with this one brah." and then he just stared literally through my skull.  I think I maxed out his limited brain power at the time.  Anyway, normally I'd just bail on a place but I love the Path and figured it was 2:00pm on a Monday so maybe they didn't have their A players working.  I paid six bucks for my tube and got outta there.

Once I got home, I decided to do some research and discovered that the issue is more likely my tires than my tubes.  I read a couple of folks recommending these things called 'Continental Gatorskins' but I have no idea whether or not they'll work on my bike because It's damn near impossible to figure any of this shit out.

Why the hell cant' they make tires like shoes or something where you just say a size fucking 10 and everyone knows what you're taking about.

New Stuff Alert

On my ride home Friday afternoon, I was flying along on the SART and I suddenly felt some weirdness on my feet.  To my shock and horror, I'd broken a pedal on my ride home.  Since I likes to keep things positive, I looked at this setback as an opportunity to get more stuff for Serena so I headed to The Path Bike Shop on Saturday morning to upgrade Serena.

The pedals that came with Serena are plastic and were available at the store for twenty bucks.  But why spend $20 on something that worked fine for a year when I can go big and look like a huge cycling stud?  Instead of the plastic pedals, I opted for the awesomeness you see in the photo above.  These pedals are the Wellgo MG-1 Platform pedals with sealed bearings made out of magnesium.  I have no idea what any of that means but they were recommended, they look badass, so I forked over $69 and bought them.  This morning was my first ride with the new pedals and they kick ass.  Its tough to see in the photo but they MG-1s have little studs on them that grab your shoes so there's zero foot slippage.  Daddy likey!

In addition to needing new pedals, Serena's chain was well overdue for a good cleaning and lube job so I picked up this White Lightning easy clean chain cleaning brush kit.  This inexpensive little bit of gear made the job of cleaning Serena's chain and cassette much easier.  Highly recommended.

Last but certainly not least, for a long time I've wanted to get a bike stand so I don't have to turn Serena upside down and rest her on my kid's pool toys to clean the chain and do minor repairs and maintenance.  The only problem is, most of the bike stands I've seen cost well over $100 and I don't want to part with that much cash.  Fortunately for me, when I was at The Path Bike Shop, I saw this small stand for $24 that lets me get the back wheel off the ground so I can spin and clean.  For twenty-four bones, this stand was perfect and, combined with the brush kid, made the chain clean and lube job a 10 minute endeavor.  Money well spent!

Serena's Official First Run Back on the SART

Serena and I triumphantly gazing out over the SART

It was a crisp morning today and I was happy to be able to commute to work again now that Serena is back in action.  I'd been on a couple of very easy rides this weekend to test out the new back wheel (WTB DX23 700c) and all seemed good so I decided to get back out there and take to the SART again.  For some reason I've got a sore quad so I thought I'd just do a moderate ride to the office but as soon as I turned onto the SART I could tell Serena wanted to run.  Serena's like a top Thoroughbred who wins from the front so when the gate opens, all you can do is get a hand full and try to stay on for the ride.  The sun was above me, the SART was wide open, Mumford and Sons was blowing up in the earphones and I took off like I was shot out of a cannon.

I have no clue if wheels have anything to do with speed but right away it seemed like I was hauling ass and the new DX23 wheels were giving me an ultra smooth ride.  My concerns that the guys at The Path had sold me an 'entry level' wheel were quickly put to rest because the ride felt great at high speed and the new wheel had no problems when I had to take sudden evasive maneuvers to avoid a broken bottle. So far so good!  Viva Serena's new wheel and viva the guys at The Path bike shop!

Serena and me at about 85mph on the SART

BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL!!

Serena is back!  Check'er out, looking dark, confident, intimidating, and sexy with her new back wheel!  I was excited when I got her back so I immediately took Serena for a short spin around the neighborhood and gave the new rear wheel a close inspection.

The folks at The Path bike shop chose a WTB DX23 700c aluminum alloy wheel for me (below):

I have no clue about bike wheels but it looks pretty freaking badass to me.  I'm not sure what a 'c' is, but my new rear wheel's got 700 of them so I'm sure when it comes to ass kicking on a bike, there is no match for the WTB DX23 700c....clearly the technology and materials used for my new wheel are second to none.

After giving my new rear wheel an easy test ride and a close visual inspection, I decided I needed to do more research on this WTB company.  I looked up WTB on the computer and clearly these guys are freaks when it comes to wheels.  On their 'about' page, it talks about how they were founded in 1982 in California when mountain biking was a mostly unknown sport.  Then I saw this photo of their original crew and knew I had a high quality product from a bunch of well hard bike riding professionals:

That's the WTB crew back in 1986 at the Nationals in Durango Colorado.  Check those dudes out, they clearly know what they're doing. 

After looking up WTB as a company, I wanted to read about the DX23 700c and see what people had to say about this ultra badass next generation equipment the good folks at The Path put on Serena, and that's when things went south.

Turns out that even though The WTB DX23 700c looks like some sort of futuristic weapon, its classified as an 'entry level' wheel.  What the hell man?  Entry level?  I'll admit I'm no Lance Armstrong, but I'm sure as hell not entry level either.  My kid's pink Hello Kitty cruiser is fucking entry level, not Serena!  On top of Serena's new wheel being called 'entry level', the reviews for the WTB DX23 aren't exactly stellar either.  To be fair, WTB is considered 'legendary' by most folks but the DX23 700c had a couple of people say it gets bent out of shape very easily, which is a concern to say the least because the last thing I want is to be hoofing it down the SART....AGAIN!

In the end, I'm going to just trust the folks at The Path even though I'm clearly not entry level and I'm insulted to be classified as such.  Normally I'd return to the offending party and demand satisfaction but the guy I talked to at The Path had a goatee, tattoos, and he looked like he smokes a lot of weed so he's gotta know a lot about bikes right?  I shall give him the benefit of the doubt and take Serena on a brisk ride today soon after I take my morning shit.  Stay tuned for the results.

Serena is On the Disabled List

Well for f*cks sake, when I was almost home yesterday I blew out another spoke.  To say the spoke issue is depressing is a major understatement, that's the third one in a month.  For one, I didn't get to ride to work today.  For another, I had to pedal my bike the last half mile home with a wobbly wheel like some spazz.  Not as important but equally lame, I'm starting to feel like the dork kid who got a Huffy for Christmas when all of his friends got a Mongoose, Redline, or, the most badass 1980's BMX bike of them all, the PK Ripper.

Feeling dejected and like my bike sucks, I did some research online today and discovered the following:

• Spoke breakage is totally unrelated to weight so you comedians can save your comments about my ass being too big to ride a bike.
• Apparently, once you break one spoke, it causes stress on a bunch of the other spokes because the wheel tension is off so further broken spokes are almost certainly going to happen if you don't have a serious professional re-do the wheel
• I'm a well hung stud who ladies love (ok, that wasn't online but its true)

So, like all Americans, rather than taking any of the blame myself, I decided to blame my local bike store and find an authorized Specialized repair place and go there.  After a quick search on Google and Yelp, I found The Path Bike Shop in Tustin, CA.  Feeling like there might be some light at the end of the tunnel, I informed my co-workers that I'd be 'working from the road' and rushed home and went to The Path.  When I got there, I was surprised...simply put, this unassuming bike shop is seriously badass. 

I brought Serena inside and found the repair dude and, while trying not to cry, explained to him that I kept breaking spokes.  The guy assured me that even with my large size and fully loaded dual pannier bag, there's no way weight is an issue.  Apparently the stuff I read online is correct and once you break a spoke, its likely they'll keep breaking because of the uneven tension created by the first one.  He checked all the spokes and showed me that there were three other ones getting ready to go.  Bike repair guy suggested I get a new wheel and it would be sixty bucks.  I told him to get me a new wheel at once.  He then, sheepishly suggested that since I ride nearly every day, I may want to get a 'nicer' wheel.  I braced myself for the price tag of the 'nicer' wheel but then he said "That will be like....eighty-five dollars".  HOOK ME UP DUDE!!!  At this  point I was already thinking about how much I love The Path Bike Shop and then "Sappy" by Nirvana came on the sound system and it took my love of this heretofore unknown bike shop to a whole new level.  Unfortunately, my joy soon came to an end when bike repair guy told me he'd need to order the new wheel and it would be a week.  As soon as bike repair guy said I'd be waiting a weeek, Nancy Nofun at the cash register changed the song to something lame.  Long story short, Serena is in the hopefully capable hands of bike repair dude at The Path Bike Shop.  So far the gear, bikes, knowledgeable staff, etc. at this joint seem to be totally legit.  As long as they get Serena back to me in top shape, they'll have a customer for life.

The only part of this whole experience that made no sense to me whatsoever was the conversation I had with my wife when we were leaving the bike store.  It went as follows:

Me:  "Well, that place was cool and I think $85 sounds like a good deal.  Hopefully the new wheel will mean I don't get stranded anymore"

Wife:  "Hahaha...Serena's getting new shoes.  You spend more on her than you do on me!"

Me:  "Oh geez...you've gotta be shitting me"

Wife:  "No, if your bike's getting new shoes, I should get new shoes"

Me:  "What the f*ck are you talking about?"

Wife:  "I should get a new pair of Christian Louboutin shoes"

Me:  "Don't those things cost like eight hundred bucks a pair?"

Wife:  "Well, you're spending $85 on new shoes for Serena!"

Me:  "What??  That doesn't even make any sense.  What are you talking about?"

Wife:  "Yup, you'll see"

Me:  "I'll see what????"

Wife:  silence....

I'll miss you Serena, get well soon.