Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Learning to Live With Our Juicer

Here's me, bright and early this morning, enjoying a nice full glass of kale, apples, carrot, and my good friend spirulina for a nice, refreshing breakfast.  You see, the wife got out of bed early and before I even got in the shower, I could hear the Vitamix 5200 springing to life.  I knew there would be no solid food for me on this fine morning.  Apparently the wife thinks the kids should be part of the Vitamix revolution too.  Here they are this am, trying their best to look like they enjoy their blended concoctions.  (My youngest daughter said it tastes like grass and toilet paper). - Side Note:  I realize I look like a pile of warmed up poop in the above photo, but what the hell, they ain't all golden and I'm more of a natural light kind of guy.

Long story short, the Vitamix 5200 is here to stay and the wife seems to be in love with it.  Granted, mixing in fruit and veg juices on a regular basis is going to be much healthier and truth be told, I didn't get hungry last night, slept fantastic, and was two pounds lighter when I got on the scale this am.  The jury is still out on the not being hungry part since we watched a show last night that featured these three weirdos living in San Francisco who are 'polyamorists' meaning they're allowed to have many loves.  This particular 'triad' was two dumpy dudes with beards and some old broad with purple hair and an ass as wide as Ohio who all slept in the same bed and screwed each other.  Every time the wife person wanted one of the dudes to nail her, she'd raise her eyebrows up and down really fast like one of those old silent movie people and say "Wanna go snuggle?".  The whole thing made me want to puke so I'm not sure if my fruit and veg drink and soup for dinner was what had me feeling full or just the disgust I felt at 'Wanna snuggle?'.  Long story short though, outside of outrageous farts that smell like earth and mint, I'm feeling pretty darn good and I'm not hungry so good on me.

Of course, with all change comes a learning curve.  Last night, after I drank my incredibly strong smoothie and nearly barfed, the wife announced that she had mistakenly used three times as much kale as you're supposed to in the recipe.  I nearly panicked thinking I was going to die but she assured me I'd be ok.  Then, this morning, the wife forgot to start the Vitamix 5200 on low when she was cleaning it and the soapy water mixture shot half way up the side of our cabinets in the kitchen.  Looked like Peter North had been by the house and done his magic on my cherry wood!

I'm not totally sold on the idea of doing a full juice fast, but I do have to say I'm surprised that its pretty good stuff and I'm feeling alright.  I'll allow the Vitamix 5200 to stay with us for a while longer to see how it goes.

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